There was a time when the way men and women related was different…
There was a time when women were ladies…
There was a time when men were men…
This was a time that has long since been forgotten.
On Sunday, April 14, 1912, history was made by ordinary men and women at 11:40 P.M. Over 2000 people had boarded the massive steamship; only about 705 arrived safely in New York to tell about it. The cry that night was, “Women and children first.” And the real men of that bygone era took this to heart, standing nobly in the freezing air on the Titanic’s slippery decks to die so that others might live.
This concept is foreign to our generation. While before the mid 1800’s, an independent woman was a reproach to her family and faith, she has become the role model for the girls of our day. In the earlier days of Western Civilization, a lady was protected and defended as the weaker vessel by: not traveling alone, not going out at night alone, and not attending events without a male escort. It was a form of protection and it silently stated, “Women need to be protected.”
If we look to the Bible, we see the only two examples of women going out unprotected are that of Dinah and the nameless woman of Deuteronomy 22:27. Of Dinah it says in Genesis 34:1-2:
“Now Dinah, the daughter Leah had borne to Jacob, went out to visit the women of the land. When Shechem son of Hamor the Hivite, the ruler of that area, saw her; he took her and violated her.”
And of the nameless woman of Deuteronomy 22:27, it says,
“For he found her in the field, and the betrothed damsel cried, and there was none to save her.”
After looking at the only examples of unprotected women left to us in the Scriptures, it seems safe to say that independent, vulnerable women are not a part of God’s original plan.
We are not saying that times before ours were by any means perfect, and we understand that they will never be. There have always been unprotected women, but we want to take care that we recognize the trend of susceptible women brought about by feminism in today’s culture. Unlike the previous mindset held by many Americans, the majority of us are not shocked when a woman walks alone at night, lives by herself, or travels without a protector. Feminism is so predominate in our culture women often act offended when a guy gives up his seat or opens the door for her. She may be alright with that, but when she does spend time with him, she is only concerned with arm wrestling him, trying to outrun him, outsmarting him, and proving herself generally better than him. (And yes, we too are guilty of this sometimes.)
Sadly, even in Christian circles there is not much of a difference in the roles of women and men. At the same time that we acknowledge a difference, we treat each other as though we were the same.
Our desire is to be ladies and to aid real, Christian gentlemen rise above the low expectations of our culture. That is why we are writing this letter to all guys who will read it- telling you plainly the longings of our heart as your sisters in Christ. We call it, ‘Someone please protect me… A letter to Christian Young Men”.
Dear Brothers in Christ,
Though we may not always show it, there are those of us who do want to remain in our Biblical roles, despite the criticism of our culture. We want to ignore the messages pushed upon us by the world, and seek God’s Word on how to behave and live. We know you, too, are under attack and are told to become less than God would have you be. We pray for you; that you would:
“Be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might, put on the full armor of God so that you can stand against the devils schemes.”
We want to encourage you with the words of the Apostle Paul:
“Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.”-1Timothy 4:12
Please protect us as your sisters. Though some may not like it at first you will win the hearts of those around you when you choose to do what is right.
Protect us in speech by not voicing things that do not follow the guidelines of Philippians 4:8,
“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”
Protect us by not cursing or being crude. Protect us by keeping your speech on the issues of real life and not filling our heads with the foolishness of horror movies or artificial violence.
Protect our lives as if they were your own. Please, on one extreme, do not take us lightly and consider us another discard able play thing. Or, on the other extreme, treat us as another one of “the guys”. Please remember that we are God’s princess, the “weaker vessel”, mothers of future generations, and most importantly- our lives are precious to Jesus and they are being lived for His glory.
Protect us in love. Remember it is just as loving to correct me in wrong as to encourage me. Do not believe the lies that tell you that the only way to be happy is to give us everything we want. God did not intend for you to be a slave to our every whim. Love us in a 1 Corinthians type of love.
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”
Protect us in faith. God has called men to be Spiritual leaders, but with the feminist movement women have taken the seats in the gates and now hold the places of headship in the workforce, the military, the government, the home, and even the church. In Isaiah 3:12, it says that the sign of a curse of a nation is women ruling over men. In our sin we tend to want to lead and we understand it can be hard for men to step up, but let us encourage you in your God ordained roles to lead in the Christian faith. 1 Timothy 2:4 says,
“And it was not Adam who was deceived, but the woman being quite deceived, fell into transgression.”
Protect us from false doctrines and search the Scriptures in order to proclaim truth.
Finally, please protect us in purity. Don’t call us beautiful or tell us something that might lead our thoughts astray. Don’t look at us like we are meat or a prize to be won; look at us as the wife of another. Protect us from the world’s darts as sisters in Christ. Please keep our conversations pure of immoral speech and free from illusions of sexual things. Treat us in such a way that it is natural for us to see you as a brother and comfortable for us to hold a conversation with you.
It is not our job (or our place) to instruct you, nor is it our prerogative to blame you for all our faults- for they are many. Our goal in writing to you is to communicate the desire and prayer of our hearts: that you would become mighty warriors for Christ. As women God created us with an inbuilt desire to be protected. According to personality, family, and amount of cultural influence, this desire is stronger, in some, than others. But the tendency remains. When a woman doesn’t feel protected, it is very easy for her heart to become bitter and full of mistrust. Nearly all the leading feminists in the 1800’s and early 1900’s were wives of abusive husbands.
One thing we can promise is this: we do not expect perfect men. We are by no stretch of the imagination perfect women, but by God’s grace we are in the processes of constant sanctification. And by God’s grace, we will be the able to encourage and advance real men as they rise up to serve the Lord.